he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Randomize
