she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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