We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
