Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
