everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
