I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Randomize