last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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