He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
