Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
