i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
