I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
How's work?
Spinning.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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