It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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