why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
