we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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