How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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