but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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