She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
