On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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