Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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