you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
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