his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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