I have demons in me.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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