I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
