She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Randomize
