omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Come share oat with me in your robe
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
