If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
