fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Randomize
