thus making me awesome and them whores
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
