I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
it's great music for shaving your balls
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
