Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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