idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
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