i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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