I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
