well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
