I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
