Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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