whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
