the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
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