yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
