he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
