never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize