Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
