East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Randomize
