I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
