This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
