man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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