I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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