Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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