how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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