my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
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