if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
